That notion of compromise is definitely the plan

We’ve learned on our DR journey that any sort of absolute gotta-do-it-this-way approach is not going to fly very well, so we’ve learned how to compromise. The thing that caught me off guard with this one, is that I was just so delighted to have enough income again to even be thinking about restoring my savings account(s). I used to have one big savings account as you describe, and I used to track various goal amounts within it. But somehow with the divorce and layoff experiences behind me, I need to have something more solid in place besides just a spreadsheet. I want to see a list of accounts, each with their own balance, so I can see that yes, every category is taken care of. Call it a form of reassurance that works for me.
We’ll come up with some way to compromise on how much we put into those funds, such that DH doesn’t feel antsy that too much is being diverted, yet I feel like future needs/goals are being attended to. We’ll figure it out.

What we did around here was have two savings accounts, on paper

I have my sinking funds all in my spread sheets and keep track of exactly how much I put in, or take out from each sinking fund, but it goes into our general savings account along with our bef (now working on our ffef). That way we earn more interest on the combined amount, we felt better because we had “more” in savings, but we also had the mindset that x amount of dollars was designated or “named” for set bills when they came around. It takes a little while to get it all built up, but the peace of mind it gives is so soothing.

Take that trip we went on in May, we left here with what we were told was good tires, but we also left here with a $2,000 sinking fund specifically for tire and truck repair/replace as well as our bef, plus some in our other sinking funds. We ended up having to pay out almost $1,800 for tires while we were out, but it didn’t ruin our trip because we knew the money was there AND that we still had our savings, our other sinking funds AND our bef. That peace of mind was so wonderful.

Therein lay the problem

I have not been putting money from my earnings, into savings, ever since I was laid off at the start of 2011. I haven’t had regular hourly income until earlier this year when I got part-time off-farm work. All my earnings between the layoff and the part-time work have been lump sales amounts from farm operations and went back into farm operations. That was intended to be a stopgap measure when I first lost my job, particularly since DH had a very healthy savings account that could “cover” for our EF needs. At some point along the line, that short-term stop-gap became normal habit. And now that my earnings have gone back up, I’m trying to change that habit.

Additionally, he has always resisted the idea of sinking funds with his own accounts. I know some folks like having them and some don’t, but I have learned it’s important for me to have those funds allocated and separated well in advance rather than just all pooled together.

Now that my earnings have increased, a lot of our financial situation and practices are changing, mostly for the better. Yet a few will be things we learned in class but have never implemented until now. I think that’s where the resistance is coming from.